   Current Post On Trae’s Blog:
So it was literally more than twenty years ago that I first put one of my dumbest creations on the internet: The Steven Seagal Movie Generator.
Like I seriously publicly launched that dumb thing back in 2004, and for those of you who were unaware, it assembles a title, cast and plot of a fake Steven Seagal movie from elements of his (real) bad films.
I honestly got the idea from a former-friend, who in high school wrote a comedic piece about how you could mash up the titles of Seagal films in the weird underground "newspaper" that got handed out for a few years. But I took it a few steps further, and made a whole thing.
Mostly it just sat there though, a thing I made once and never went back to. I followed it up with the Sci-Fi Channel Movie Generator (later retitled the Syfy Movie Generator) in 2008. I spent more time on that one, doing a later design update that made the "Syfy" movies show up on a fake DVD back cover.
But the Steven Seagal generator just sort of sat there, untouched.
And Steven Seagal kept making (terrible) movies with (predictable) titles. Like a lot. But the generator still only spat out movies culled from the nineties and early 2000s, ignoring all of his new stuff. There was a whole library of awful movies that just weren't in there, and it made the generator feel less relevant.
So, uh, I went and did something about that today.
First off, I redesigned the page. Now it looks like the back of a VHS tape box. Then I loaded the elements of about twenty-five additional films into the generator. And that was harder than I thought it would be, since some of the films are so obscure that they're not well documented. I literally had to do some deep research to figure out a lot of the basic plot details that are now in the generator.
But I did it.
And it's done.
And the generator is now fully loaded.
It's still useless and dumb, though.
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Trae, you are awesome.
I do my best. Technically this strip takes place prior to your wedding though in the timeline, so it presents a continuity error. 😛
I think she can forgive that
NO. NO FORGIVENESS.
BAH
Man Vanessa, that looks nothing like you.
I know, she’s supposed to warn us before she gets a dye job (and maybe warn her hubby before a sex change) 😛
He should just stop and leave though. Embarrassment from Lynn is her being extremely benevolent.
Aww man i was hoping for Lynn to grab the dude by his armpits and throw him straight to the ground with full force.
Lynn’s got a mean right cross, but she’s not a trained fighter.
Also, the dude has done literally nothing to provoke a violent confrontation. He’s lied, and is about to get kicked out — but Lynn has no indication that he won’t go peacefully.
All the more reason Lynn should kick his ass right then and there.
He hasn’t left yet. There’s still time to do something boneheadedly stupid which DOES deserve a violent reaction.
What part of “no reason to punch him” doesn’t compute?
The whole “No reason to Punch Him” doesn’t compute. I see violence as perfect answer for this situation. We all wanna see Lynn beat the shit out of someone. It’s one of the best parts of this comic. So please give us what we the fans want is more Lynn beating the shit out of congoers who deserve it like this jackass.
And that’s how Lynn would get arrested for assault.
And that’s Lynn becomes quite the badass, because having jail under her belt makes people so intimidated they run from her
Or it would just ruin her life (and by extension Megan’s – as Lynn is largely financially supporting her). That and Lynn really wouldn’t do well in prison.
I have done almost exactly this on my smartphone with our reg system. Usually I radio security to have them watch the guy/gal in question as well. though. 🙂
I think we should all start using badge numbers
Its a lot of extra work but prevents crap like this