Current Post On Trae’s Blog:
So it was literally more than twenty years ago that I first put one of my dumbest creations on the internet: The Steven Seagal Movie Generator.
Like I seriously publicly launched that dumb thing back in 2004, and for those of you who were unaware, it assembles a title, cast and plot of a fake Steven Seagal movie from elements of his (real) bad films.
I honestly got the idea from a former-friend, who in high school wrote a comedic piece about how you could mash up the titles of Seagal films in the weird underground "newspaper" that got handed out for a few years. But I took it a few steps further, and made a whole thing.
Mostly it just sat there though, a thing I made once and never went back to. I followed it up with the Sci-Fi Channel Movie Generator (later retitled the Syfy Movie Generator) in 2008. I spent more time on that one, doing a later design update that made the "Syfy" movies show up on a fake DVD back cover.
But the Steven Seagal generator just sort of sat there, untouched.
And Steven Seagal kept making (terrible) movies with (predictable) titles. Like a lot. But the generator still only spat out movies culled from the nineties and early 2000s, ignoring all of his new stuff. There was a whole library of awful movies that just weren't in there, and it made the generator feel less relevant.
So, uh, I went and did something about that today.
First off, I redesigned the page. Now it looks like the back of a VHS tape box. Then I loaded the elements of about twenty-five additional films into the generator. And that was harder than I thought it would be, since some of the films are so obscure that they're not well documented. I literally had to do some deep research to figure out a lot of the basic plot details that are now in the generator.
But I did it.
And it's done.
And the generator is now fully loaded.
It's still useless and dumb, though.
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*gets some popcorn*
hehehehehehehehehheheheheheheheheh. *JUSTICE*
And those of us that get the joke are laughing out heads off! XD
Oh dear. Will bloodstains wash out of the upholstery on those chairs?
Also, I want to see the payoff for whatever is going on with the shirtless guy in the background.
He’s cosplaying half a character from “Free!”
Honestly I think even new readers will get the gist, if not the details.
Does Terrence really think he has the authority to kick someone who they both acknowledge has a hotel room out of the hotel? For not wearing a badge?
In the face of such immovable stupidity, I can see why Max decided to quietly turn the retribution dial up to 11.
I thought about this too. What an absolute pompous douche lol.
You never kick someone out of the hotel. You contact hotel staff or the police, and have them do it…
Either of whom would laugh at Terrence for trying it for this reason. Kicking someone out of the hotel is for things like breaking the hotel’s rules, or for actual crimes.
I wonder how many parts of what Terrence is trying to do were covered in the volunteer meeting he thought he was too good to go to? (I figure that even if he did end up going to it, he was feeling so full of himself that he wasn’t paying any attention.)
Heck, he may have actually heard it and just assumed it didn’t apply to him since he’s staff. Terrence seems like kind of person…