Current Post On Trae’s Blog:
So it was literally more than twenty years ago that I first put one of my dumbest creations on the internet: The Steven Seagal Movie Generator.
Like I seriously publicly launched that dumb thing back in 2004, and for those of you who were unaware, it assembles a title, cast and plot of a fake Steven Seagal movie from elements of his (real) bad films.
I honestly got the idea from a former-friend, who in high school wrote a comedic piece about how you could mash up the titles of Seagal films in the weird underground "newspaper" that got handed out for a few years. But I took it a few steps further, and made a whole thing.
Mostly it just sat there though, a thing I made once and never went back to. I followed it up with the Sci-Fi Channel Movie Generator (later retitled the Syfy Movie Generator) in 2008. I spent more time on that one, doing a later design update that made the "Syfy" movies show up on a fake DVD back cover.
But the Steven Seagal generator just sort of sat there, untouched.
And Steven Seagal kept making (terrible) movies with (predictable) titles. Like a lot. But the generator still only spat out movies culled from the nineties and early 2000s, ignoring all of his new stuff. There was a whole library of awful movies that just weren't in there, and it made the generator feel less relevant.
So, uh, I went and did something about that today.
First off, I redesigned the page. Now it looks like the back of a VHS tape box. Then I loaded the elements of about twenty-five additional films into the generator. And that was harder than I thought it would be, since some of the films are so obscure that they're not well documented. I literally had to do some deep research to figure out a lot of the basic plot details that are now in the generator.
But I did it.
And it's done.
And the generator is now fully loaded.
It's still useless and dumb, though.
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Awkward passive aggressive comments at 30 paces!
They need a new poster.
“BorkCon
We punch Nazis”
Any bets on how fast Jim gets nasty?
Judging by how Jim looks right now, it will get Ugly quick. I bet Jim will try some smear campaigns to put a damper on Bork Con. But I think it might backfire too because people at cons don’t like Nazis and I’m sure that incident might come up.
Judging by how Jim looks right now, it will get Ugly quick. I bet Jim will try some smear campaigns to put a damper on Bork Con. But I think it might backfire too because people at cons don’t like Nazis and I’m sure that incident might come up.
This is probably one of the only instances where passive aggressive comments are better than pretty much anything. Passive aggressiveness if fairly easy to ignore if you’re busy focusing on other things. Outright hostility and smear campaigns would make for a much more trying weekend.
I’m actually surprised Jim is upset at all. Lynn burned the bridge between them by committing assault and battery while working for Jim’s con, then lying to Jim’s face about it.
Was Garner really that effective as con staff that Jim resents Lynn poaching him?
If Jim runs a smear campaign it will be because he’s gotten used to getting his way and hates a challenge to his power. He hasn’t been petty in the time we’ve seen him in the strip and smearing Bork con is definitely petty.
True it would be petty but he has managed to manipulate staffers to side with him and against anyone he opposes. So he could make some attempts to manipulate con goers to not go to Bork Con. But because he right next to Lynn, he’ll probably do something very childish in my opinion because even fully grown adults can act immature sometimes.
*lays out a lawn chair and breaks out the popcorn*
Oh this is gonna be good.