Current Post On Trae’s Blog:
So it was literally more than twenty years ago that I first put one of my dumbest creations on the internet: The Steven Seagal Movie Generator.
Like I seriously publicly launched that dumb thing back in 2004, and for those of you who were unaware, it assembles a title, cast and plot of a fake Steven Seagal movie from elements of his (real) bad films.
I honestly got the idea from a former-friend, who in high school wrote a comedic piece about how you could mash up the titles of Seagal films in the weird underground "newspaper" that got handed out for a few years. But I took it a few steps further, and made a whole thing.
Mostly it just sat there though, a thing I made once and never went back to. I followed it up with the Sci-Fi Channel Movie Generator (later retitled the Syfy Movie Generator) in 2008. I spent more time on that one, doing a later design update that made the "Syfy" movies show up on a fake DVD back cover.
But the Steven Seagal generator just sort of sat there, untouched.
And Steven Seagal kept making (terrible) movies with (predictable) titles. Like a lot. But the generator still only spat out movies culled from the nineties and early 2000s, ignoring all of his new stuff. There was a whole library of awful movies that just weren't in there, and it made the generator feel less relevant.
So, uh, I went and did something about that today.
First off, I redesigned the page. Now it looks like the back of a VHS tape box. Then I loaded the elements of about twenty-five additional films into the generator. And that was harder than I thought it would be, since some of the films are so obscure that they're not well documented. I literally had to do some deep research to figure out a lot of the basic plot details that are now in the generator.
But I did it.
And it's done.
And the generator is now fully loaded.
It's still useless and dumb, though.
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Is the con being SWATed, or is there like a legitimate thing happening elsewhere in the hotel/nearby/in the con that’s off panel?
God, this is good…. brings back memories
not sure why but that swat team reminds me of chronicles of crosarth.
Langland, I deleted your comment because you are literally posting spoilers.
Now I’m afraid to post theories in case I accidentally guess correctly…
Aw, what the hell:
Boy, they’re really cracking down on phony fire alarms this year!
Well, you’re allowed to guess — but Langland was physically present for the story I’m recounting, so it’s a bit different. 😛
All I can think is ‘yes Sarah, it’s all about you.’
And that I’m sure I heard a tale about a SWAT, but not recalling details…
Now I’m wondering how many cons have visits from a SWAT team. The story I heard happened 30+ years ago.
So, con disaster karma is like earthquakes along a tectonic fault line, if it doesn’t move for a long time, when it does let go, it goes BIG…
Let me guess, next most likely cause (after some MMO-playing prick — or a rival con — swatting the convention for lulz) is mundanes seeing weapon-carrying cosplayers and freaking?
That would be my real guess
This story happened maybe 5 or 6 years ago. I think it was the last year No Brand Con was at the Ramada Inn at Eau Claire, WI. All I can say I was really scared of not getting shot by the Cops over one Con goer’s stupidity or absent mind or whatever that said con goer was or was not thinking.
But I will try not to try to spoil it because I though Trae would alter the story somewhat which I guess he did with an Underage Drunken Staffer.
And with that said I think Max is tooo Young to be an Adoptive Father to Sarah. There has to be like 15 years of an age difference which means no one at the age of 15 could legally adopt a kid.
a 12 year old and a 16 year old have had kids…
disturbing story? yes…
Yes but I said legal adopt. I know 12 year olds and 16 year olds have kids. It happens every day, in fact it happens a lot up here where I live.
The point is that Max maybe old but he’s not a Old that he could pass as the adoptive father of Sarah. She’d have better chances at convincing Glenn.
Maybe Sarah figures the cops are drunk as well?
I remember this happening
O_O I gotta know what’s going on now.
For some reason I’m reminded of the time a maid mistook the “Toon alarm clock” an attendee brought for their fur parade costume for an actual bomb, and some dopy hotel security guy who had never even SEEN an SF convention called the bomb squad. Joyful highlights include the guy remarking to one of the cops that yes of course he knew it wasn’t real, he just wanted to harass the “queers”. The cop in question was gay. This did not end well for the security guy. Thank you God for your bountiful mercies… 🙂
I’d love to know more about this. is there a link?
Actually that’s pretty much it. It was long enough ago that even the guilty don’t deserve having it raked up for them again, and this is enough for amusement purposes.