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Current Post On Trae’s Blog:
- Traegorn

Like I seriously publicly launched that dumb thing back in 2004, and for those of you who were unaware, it assembles a title, cast and plot of a fake Steven Seagal movie from elements of his (real) bad films.
I honestly got the idea from a former-friend, who in high school wrote a comedic piece about how you could mash up the titles of Seagal films in the weird underground "newspaper" that got handed out for a few years. But I took it a few steps further, and made a whole thing.
Mostly it just sat there though, a thing I made once and never went back to. I followed it up with the Sci-Fi Channel Movie Generator (later retitled the Syfy Movie Generator) in 2008. I spent more time on that one, doing a later design update that made the "Syfy" movies show up on a fake DVD back cover.
But the Steven Seagal generator just sort of sat there, untouched.
And Steven Seagal kept making (terrible) movies with (predictable) titles. Like a lot. But the generator still only spat out movies culled from the nineties and early 2000s, ignoring all of his new stuff. There was a whole library of awful movies that just weren't in there, and it made the generator feel less relevant.
So, uh, I went and did something about that today.
First off, I redesigned the page. Now it looks like the back of a VHS tape box. Then I loaded the elements of about twenty-five additional films into the generator. And that was harder than I thought it would be, since some of the films are so obscure that they're not well documented. I literally had to do some deep research to figure out a lot of the basic plot details that are now in the generator.
But I did it.
And it's done.
And the generator is now fully loaded.
It's still useless and dumb, though.
Hey look Trae there you are on the far right of the first panel.
Correction, 2nd panel.
…I mean, that’s fair. It’s not like you can plan on a car exploding, and once one does, there’s probably other things on your mind than the backup registration.
Oh hell, I’d be stricken absolutely speechless there. For once, something went wrong with reg, and it’s COMPLETELY UNDERSTANDABLE AND MAKES SENSE. This stuff is unicorn territory. I’d practically be in tears – for once the problems would have a logical, explicable, and sensible cause. It’s even one you could explain to cranky line-standers. It’s even one some of them are liable to accept! Maybe.
Plus, this accident seems to have at least temporarily slapped Garner into non-obstructionism. So he has that going for him, which is nice.
I don’t know about -completely- understandable (‘wait, the car just…. blew up?’), but it’s a far better situation than most.
Yep. Yep. Yep.
We make sure multiple people, not ont he same car or plane, travel with electronic copies of important documents, but quite often there’s only one printout. (Sometimes, SOMETIMES there’s two.)
This is honestly as good as a con can be expected to do. The Plan B has a plan C to back it up, and if plan C is inconvenient.. well, the sheer fact of its existence is good work.
This is why you do 2 copies of the hard copy held by 2 diffrent people
If the hard copy is Plan A, sometimes this is wise! We’ve done so.
If the hard copy is Plan B, heck nah. Don’t waste paper and printer ink you’re unlikely to need, especially on multiple copies, especially if you have a printer readily available to you. But having a thumbdrive and/or dropbox and/or Doogle Docs of assorted things? Heck yes.