Current Post On Trae’s Blog:
So it was literally more than twenty years ago that I first put one of my dumbest creations on the internet: The Steven Seagal Movie Generator.
Like I seriously publicly launched that dumb thing back in 2004, and for those of you who were unaware, it assembles a title, cast and plot of a fake Steven Seagal movie from elements of his (real) bad films.
I honestly got the idea from a former-friend, who in high school wrote a comedic piece about how you could mash up the titles of Seagal films in the weird underground "newspaper" that got handed out for a few years. But I took it a few steps further, and made a whole thing.
Mostly it just sat there though, a thing I made once and never went back to. I followed it up with the Sci-Fi Channel Movie Generator (later retitled the Syfy Movie Generator) in 2008. I spent more time on that one, doing a later design update that made the "Syfy" movies show up on a fake DVD back cover.
But the Steven Seagal generator just sort of sat there, untouched.
And Steven Seagal kept making (terrible) movies with (predictable) titles. Like a lot. But the generator still only spat out movies culled from the nineties and early 2000s, ignoring all of his new stuff. There was a whole library of awful movies that just weren't in there, and it made the generator feel less relevant.
So, uh, I went and did something about that today.
First off, I redesigned the page. Now it looks like the back of a VHS tape box. Then I loaded the elements of about twenty-five additional films into the generator. And that was harder than I thought it would be, since some of the films are so obscure that they're not well documented. I literally had to do some deep research to figure out a lot of the basic plot details that are now in the generator.
But I did it.
And it's done.
And the generator is now fully loaded.
It's still useless and dumb, though.
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I’m convinced that Troy completely hates himself.
I’ve had the opportunity to be a musician twice on either the trombone OR the keyboard, I’ve had the opportunity to be a magician performing at children’s birthday parties AND I’ve worked in New York City as an actor reaching “off Broadway” status in one play.
And I’m currently a cashier at Wal-Mart.
So yes Troy, I know about bad decisions. You, on the other hand, appear to be a fairly popular writer who gets paid to show up at conventions and sign books.
So, STFU!
Just a small correction — Troy is a voice actor, not a writer
My bad. I’m certain if I retained information about the strip better, I would have known that.
Still. Voice actor, gets to do cool job, gets paid to go to conventions and give his opinions…
Troy, STFU.
As one of the Unemployed with no savings, yeah, life choices, those bastards.
I swear it was like you were predicting NDK this year. We had our con despite all the insane flooding in colorado.