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My grandmother died last night. This wasn't a shock or a surprise. Her health has been on the decline, and she's been in hospice for the last month. She lived a long life, and in her final days she was surrounded by her three adult children.
My grandma was a kind woman. She wasn't perfect, but I always felt loved in her presence. She was a retired kindergarten teacher, and was still working when I was a kid. I have so many happy memories sitting at her kitchen table, and I'm going to carry those with me for the rest of my life. She was also proof that anyone who claims that you get more conservative as you get older is full of shit, because she certainly didn't.
I think it's interesting how the body processes grief sometimes. I don't know that I'll cry, but over the past month, knowing this was coming, I've felt a tension in my gut. Now that she's passed, instead of relief that tension is replaced by a sense of emptiness. That something is missing that should still be there. Something has been taken away, and I feel it.
Of course, as I wrote that, I immediately started crying... so I guess my body processes grief in pretty ordinary ways too.
I wanted to come up with something profound linking this to Beltane, which we sit in the middle of right now, but it just seemed hackneyed. Like I was trying to dig out some greater significance when the truth is death comes whenever it wants. The only predictable thing about it is that it's the end of all of our journeys. I hope that when I pass I'm so lucky to have lived such a long life with people that I love around me in my final days.
For the record, I will be fine. I just needed to get these words out while they were still in my head. I don't have some rousing conclusion or deep insight to tack on here at the end, just that gut feeling that something is missing.
Because it is.
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…and that’s probably the healthiest breakfast anyone at the con had.
Nah, NebrasKon has a Perkins right across the street. Many a bleary eyed breakfast had there. And lunch. Several dinners. More than a few late night snacks.
I have never been to Nebraskon, but I have eaten at that Perkins. Twice.
I can confirm that Omaha does, in fact, have a Perkins.
The weird thing is, I think that’s one of maybe…two? Perkins in the entire town.
Lincoln has more Perkins than Omaha, and its half the size of this town. Weird stuff.
I go for the McDonald’s Breakfast. Sausage McMuffin with Egg, Hasbrown and a Coke.
It’s not the healthiest thing out there, but it’s better than pixie sticks.
ewww mcmuffins are terrible… biscuits all the way.
Ewwwwww biscuits?! i do prefer the egg mcmuffins, can’t stand sausage. The breakfast burritos are OK. I wonder if they still have danishes.
I once spent most of a con flying on Space Food Sticks, with occasional portions of a beef log we all chipped in on… One of a number of experiences which probably have more folks then me me wondering how on earth I managed to live into my sixties. 🙂
One of the reasons I started having a Registration Staff breakfast on Thursday morning was to make sure all my staff got a halfway decent breakfast Thursday morning.