Current Post On Trae’s Blog:
So it was literally more than twenty years ago that I first put one of my dumbest creations on the internet: The Steven Seagal Movie Generator.
Like I seriously publicly launched that dumb thing back in 2004, and for those of you who were unaware, it assembles a title, cast and plot of a fake Steven Seagal movie from elements of his (real) bad films.
I honestly got the idea from a former-friend, who in high school wrote a comedic piece about how you could mash up the titles of Seagal films in the weird underground "newspaper" that got handed out for a few years. But I took it a few steps further, and made a whole thing.
Mostly it just sat there though, a thing I made once and never went back to. I followed it up with the Sci-Fi Channel Movie Generator (later retitled the Syfy Movie Generator) in 2008. I spent more time on that one, doing a later design update that made the "Syfy" movies show up on a fake DVD back cover.
But the Steven Seagal generator just sort of sat there, untouched.
And Steven Seagal kept making (terrible) movies with (predictable) titles. Like a lot. But the generator still only spat out movies culled from the nineties and early 2000s, ignoring all of his new stuff. There was a whole library of awful movies that just weren't in there, and it made the generator feel less relevant.
So, uh, I went and did something about that today.
First off, I redesigned the page. Now it looks like the back of a VHS tape box. Then I loaded the elements of about twenty-five additional films into the generator. And that was harder than I thought it would be, since some of the films are so obscure that they're not well documented. I literally had to do some deep research to figure out a lot of the basic plot details that are now in the generator.
But I did it.
And it's done.
And the generator is now fully loaded.
It's still useless and dumb, though.
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For some reason I’m reminded of the time the announcer could NOT make out the name on the card (and it was an original character so there were no other clues) and wound up announcing “Fred. From the planet Fred.”
(Sorry – the statute of limitations has run out of specifics. 🙂 )
HA, this one page brings back memories for me.
1) First time staffing, I got conscripted (pun intended) to run the Dealers room. I’d never had run a shop before, let alone a room full of people who were selling and buying things. I was such a nervous wreck during it. Helped a few dealers out, ended my 12 hours of doing so by going in to an anxiety attack from the nervousness and stress. Fun times.
2) Got talked in to running an eating contest. Never again.
3) Was excited to help out a convention-run video series (ugh…if you look it up…Awesome Rangers 3) as a brash Irishman. Ended up nearly killing myself a series of times.
4) Some how found myself as a backstage hand for the Cosplay contest.
5) One year, found myself on stage trying to buy time for the judges during said contest.
6) Conscripted in to forming my own committee. No regrets on this one.
We all died a little in Awesome Rangers. Some more literal that others. …some a little too close to literal, now that I think on it. 🙁
The Indestructible Ed.
Wow, I miss times when the Cosplay contest was actually that big… Ceremonies completely fills the Main Events room. Cosplay… not so much.